“This is not a habit. It’s just something I like to do!” If this comes after your unsolicited advice, then mind your own business and conjure up some of your habits which you might have a similar reaction if called on:
- Checking your phone, scrolling for messages, checking out who read what of your Instagram account, as a friend is waiting for a response. Put the phone face down, and don’t answer it unless a call comes through. Friends are important. No one wants to feel that their playing second fiddle.
- Bitting your nails. I’ve seen more men doing this in public than women. We do look at others hands for a variety of reasons. Torn and bleeding cuticles is gross and doesn’t inspire trust/intimacy. Start with a manicure, and follow through with clipping and using an emery board at home or office in private.
- Finishing another’s sentences before they’re done talking. I’m guilty on this one. Listen, they’ll be plenty of time to respond. Especially frustrating when someone is a slow talker. Listen, pay attention. It shows that you value them, not necessarily what they may be saying.
- If you have to smoke and don’t have any plans to stop, please remember those of us that you engage with and smell a sewer whenever you open your mouth. We love you, but a close conversation is going to be brief. Suck on a mint or a chew peppermint gum. Besides a smoker or someone who is congested, your pick of getting near to another is limited.
John Shinavier, RYT, Life/Career Coach