Aging Well

A New Humiliation Every Day

Posted by John Shinavier - Life Coach | Speaker on January 7, 2019
Posted in: Aging Well, General Blog. 2 Comments

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1.  Breathing is harder

2. An idea is forgotten as you move to do it.

3. Your reflection looks like your father is looking at you.

4. You scramble to finish a thought or complete a sentence.

5. Your body feels like someone replaced it with one that’s been beaten.

6. Activities that use to be taken for granted; biking, swimming, running require a lot more effort.

7. Doctors warn you to scale back on activities that are fun.

8. A day’s activities are planned around the location of bathrooms.

9. Names that one takes for granted and recall automatically have been kidnapped from your frontal lobe and dropped from your internal directory.

10. Waking up at the gym and wondering how you got there?

11.  Always ready for a lively discussion, you suddenly find yourself with nothing to say.  You can no longer respond fast enough to join in on a conversation. 

12. Suddenly, no one seems to notice you and you walk through your day feeling like your invisible.

13. Coming off of “there’s so much to do.” into looking at your calendar and seeing only doctors appointments.

Becoming older when one has always been very active is at first an afront, then concern, then a small humiliation.  Brave through all the above with a great sense of humor!

 

John Shinavier, MA, Life Coach

 

Optimism & Isolation

Posted by John Shinavier - Life Coach | Speaker on May 16, 2016
Posted in: Aging Well, General Blog. Tagged: , , , . 1 Comment

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 As someone who has worked for years in the healing arts, I have shared yoga and meditation with an emphasis on the connection to the breath.  I am a clinician as well as a life-coach.  

No One is What they Think.  In simpler terms, we are not our thoughts.  At times we can’t stop them, but we can learn, with practice, not to fixate on them and view them with detachment. 

How I have learned to integrate the above into my daily life is to serve others. Working with a non-profit I started over twenty years ago which serves the hungry and homeless in the Los Angeles area, has made me more grateful for what I have and not what I don’t.  Anyone who has done selfless service from a friend of mine in N.York who started a food pantry, to Glen who started World Harvest locally are very happy people.  

To serve someone can take as many forms as there are people.  A young man with whom I’ve had the privilege to know from his birth to the present has chosen to take this message out in his community to share a moment of kindness with a perfect stranger.  You can go to his blog at  facebook.com/hashtag/illbethereproject  

On a personal level, whenever I feel depressed, I leave the isolation of my office and go for a walk in the neighborhood.  I greet everyone that I encounter.  Just a simple “Hi, Good morning!” does it for me.  This takes me out of my loop, so to speak and my depression is lifted.  There are so many in this large city who without choice have found themselves cut off and disenfranchised and isolated without any social support.  This condition can happen to anybody.  Some of the homeless whom I’ve talked to say to me that they have never known what it takes to live in the world.

To greet, or have a conversation with a stranger is a pledge that I renew every morning.  It’s not hard to give back.  We have to wake-up ourselves, and leave our problems behind for a while and reach out to someone else who is worse off than we are.

John Shinavier, MA, Life Coachncerely

John is the founder and Executive Director of a 501c which serves the homeless of

Los Angeles County     www.underthebridgesandonthestreets.org

The 21 tips for of Aging with Awareness

Posted by John Shinavier - Life Coach | Speaker on May 20, 2015
Posted in: Aging Well. Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , . 2 Comments

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There are two ways of arriving at a ripe old age; ready to take on the world, or fade away and become invisible. Since I’ve reached such an age only a few days ago.  I thought that I would share what I have learned.

  • Eat only when your hungry and always in smaller portions.
  • A full 8 hrs. sleep is at the top of the list for mental sharpness.
  • Meditation will not only reveal your own wisdom, but has been shown in studies to lengthen ones life.
  • Stop talking, respond less, and listen more.
  • Review the supplements your taking and read up on magnesium.
  • If you’ve had life long depression, and have not taken care of it, then this period of your life will be hellish.
  • Exercise, move your body.  Gardening, and housework are not counted as exercise.
  • Pride takes on a better meaning and is more internal.  You can’t still be that insecure?
  • Find a place in your community where you can do some selfless service.  You always receive more than you give.
  • By this time in your life, you should know to spend your time with friends that are supportive and less opinionated.
  • Stop being rushed into activities that you don’t want to do.  Make “I’ll have to get back to you” your standard reply.
  • If your not alone, practice it.  Loneliness is based on regret and dependence.
  • Greet strangers on the street or throughout your day.  It takes you out of your own troubles and makes you and someone else happier.
  • Wear what ever makes you happy.  You’ve earned the label eccentric.
  • By now your aware of what makes you happy and what makes you sad.  Do more of the first.
  • Stop swearing.  It was freeing when you were young, but now just makes others feel sorry for you.
  • Above all, on a daily basis be GRATEFUL, especially when your feeling sorry for yourself.  It’s a powerful word that’s taken me a lifetime to arrive at, and the most important word to use as often as you can.

John Shinavier, MA, RYT, Life Coach